OUR DUTY TO OUR WIVES (2 Timothy – 19)
Paul has been writing to pastors in 1 & 2 Timothy and Titus. But what about their wives? What advice would Paul give to pastor’s wife today?
In prioritizing our duties, our families come before our ministries (1 Timothy 3:4-5; Titus 1-6). When Adam walked and talked with God in Eden, he realized something was missing from his life. God met that need by creating Eve, a wife for him to love and share his life (Genesis 2:18-24). He didn’t create children for him to raise, parents for him to support or a church for him to pastor. After our duty to God Himself, our next duty is to our wives and children, even before our ministries.
God has blessed me with a wonderful wife or I would not be the person I am today. The longer I am married to her the more I appreciate the fine person she is, and the more I thank God for such a special gift. Her behind-the-scenes work and faithfulness in my life and ministry is invaluable. I think her faithful, deep prayer life accomplishes more for the Kingdom than my frantic business. She is my greatest prayer supporter.
Through her I have learned about God’s unconditional love for me, because I have seen it demonstrated through her. I better understand how God can and will forgive me, for she has exemplified that time and time again. I can trust His faithfulness better because I see it lived out in her life.
Sometimes we think we could accomplish more in life if it were not for the needs of our mates and families. We can resent the time they take. Perhaps I could have spent more time in ministry without my wife and family, but it would not have accomplished as much, and the quality would have been far less. I am sure I would have burned out or failed without her help.
God commands I serve her before myself or my church (Ephesians 5:25-33). In fact, He says if I cannot serve her first, I should not be a pastor (1 Timothy 3:2-5; Titus 2:6). Being a good husband is more important than being a good pastor (1 Peter 3:7). (For more information about Christian marriage see “Marriage and Ministry” by Jerry Schmoyer https://christiantrainingonline.org/download/india/Books/english_translations/Marriage-and-Ministry-book.pdf)
God expects me to love her as He loves me (Ephesians 5:25). I am to serve her, not just have her serve me. I must show her love, help her in any way I can and always be kind and gentle to her.
Meeting her needs before my own does not take away from my ministry, but rather enriches it by maturing me. Whatever time and love I put into her I get back many times over. Learning to put someone before myself has not been easy, but has been essential in marriage and ministry. It helps me become more like Jesus Who is characterized by putting others before Himself.
The main lessons I have learned in life and the greatest spiritual and emotional growth I have experienced in life have come through my marriage. Things have not always been easy for us. God uses our imperfections and our conflicts to teach about humility, service, apologizing, forgiving and accepting forgiveness. These things cannot be learned from a book, only from life.
The older I get and the further I go in life and ministry, the more I realize that a good wife IS worth far more than rubies (Ecclesiastes 31:10-12, 30-31). And so is a good husband for you wives reading this!
Sometimes it is God’s will for a man or woman to not marry but live alone. This is no less God’s will for them than getting married is for others. God Himself promises to meet needs when there is no mate to meet them. Never feel something is wrong because you aren’t married! (June 5, 2023 Doylestown, PA)
PAUL’S ADVICE: Put your wife’s needs before your ministry and love and serve your wife unconditionally, as Christ loves you.
Proverbs 19:22 22 He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the LORD.
Proverbs 31: 10, 31 A wife of noble character who can find? She is worth far more than rubies. … 30 Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.
Men, when you stand before God, will He say “Well done, good and faithful servant” for the way you loved and served His daughter, your wife?
Would your wife say she is more important than your ministry or work?
Can she give examples of when you put her before your own needs?
What can you do, starting today, to be a more Christlike to your wife?
PRAYER REQUEST: Christian Training Organization (CTO) is sending two men to India June 17-30 to lead pastor’s conferences and speak in churches. PLEASE for these men as they travel and speak. Pray for Pastor Moses who organizes and leads the conferences. Pray for each one who comes to learn and grow in their faith and ministry. If you want to receive my India blog, pictures and prayer requests email me at jerry@schmoyer.net.
cto Rev. Dr. JERRY SCHMOYER
Christian Training Organization
Jerry@ChristianTrainingOrganization.org
(India Outreach, Spiritual Warfare, Family Ministries, Counseling, World View)
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