You Know You’ve Been to India….

(Thursday, Jan 16, 2015)  Nancy wrote this blog – something she did while listening to me give the same talk to a different group of pastors for the umpteenth time.  (At least she was awake!)

I KNOW I’M IN INDIA WHEN:

Jerry tells me 10 times a day that he’s glad I’m with him.

10 boys run to carry my one bag.

Someone is trying to touch my blond hair.

I see a store selling “Repossessed Mattresses”

Rice is the main course for breakfast, lunch and dinner

Street food is cooked corn in a small cup or a 3” banana

They serve tea to me in a 2 ounce cup

There are dozens of shoes piled outside the conference room door

Jerry wears a dress over his trousers

There is no toiled paper – and often no toilet

Dogs are wild street animals

Grown men laugh historically at Jerry’s simple magic tricks

86 degrees is winter

A herd of water buffalo cross a modern 4-lane highway

I see my next meal being cooked on a dirt floor

I pay $.40 for sterling silver ear rings but $3.50 for 2 small scoops of Baskin Robins ice cream

After 6 hours of driving at 60 miles an hour there are still continuous fields of rice patties

A hotel attendant works 12 hour days and earns $6,500 a year

Jerry eats rice and spicy bony chicken and loves it

I really get excited to see Subway

The stories I tell from the Bible are new stories to the ones listening

We don’t advertise the Christian conferences because too many people will attend and overwhelm the facilities

Multiple calendars are used for wall art

I see 4 people and a goat riding on one scooter

Drivers routinely drive north in the south-bound lanes

The car horn is used as a turn signal, passing alert and everything else

I hear the eerie whine of Muslim prayer horns at  5:30 AM

Women cover their heads and men remove their sandals as soon as someone prays

A 4 star hotel means I get 2 towels

I use a quart of hand sanitizer in 3 weeks

No 2 women ever wear the same dress (sari)

AV equipment means there is a mike as long as there is electricity

A head bob means yes, no or maybe – you are never really sure

I never pass up a bathroom stop

I arrive during the annual sewer cleaning season

Someone may offer me 2 water buffalo for my daughter

All chickens are free range

Philippians 4:11-13   I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances.  I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.  I can do everything through him who gives me strength.

What have you been complaining about today that you probably wouldn’t have been complaining about if you lived in India? 

When have you last thanked God for your life in the United States instead of complaining about things? Thank Him now.

C t O Rev. Dr. JERRY SCHMOYER
Christian Training Organization
jerry@ChristianTrainingOrganization.org
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