Every time God created something in Genesis 1 and 2 He said that it was good or very good. Every time that is until man was created. Then His response was, ”It is not good.” What was this first thing that God said was not good? It was Adam being alone before Eve was created. “It is not good for the man to be alone” (Genesis 2:18) in many ways became my most quoted passage when in India. Truly, it is not good for me to be alone! I don’t like crowds, at least not for very one, and I don’t need to have lots of friends and acquaintances, but I do need one special person with whom I can share my heart and life. God has given me the perfect mate to meet that need – Nancy.
If you’ve been reading these blogs during the past years you know how I miss her when I am in India. I feel like I am only partly here, like a big part of me is missing. There is a large, empty hole in my heart. Pastor Moses know how it affects me. When he introduced us to his church our first Sunday here he said, “Now Pastor Jerry is full!” He was right! It’s absolutely completely totally wonderful having her here with me. I was a bit concerned I wouldn’t have to be as dependent on God with her here as I was without her, but that hasn’t been the case. I am more ‘me’ and able to relate better with Him than when I am alone.
I hope each and every one of you have another human being with whom you feel completely and totally secure, safe and open. We are made to need someone with whom we have unconditional love and acceptance, someone know knows us better than we know ourselves yet loves us without reservation. This isn’t the romantic, ‘happily ever after,’ love we sometimes think it is. It takes history together. I means years of sacrificing, forgiving (without being asked), putting the other first and yourself second and learning how to meet your mate’s needs. It takes years of hard work. There must be total commitment on the part of both to do this. Hurts must be forgiven and forgotten immediately. Nancy and I are nowhere near perfect in this, we haven’t arrived. We still miscommunicate; still hurt each other (intentionally or unintentionally) and still struggle with sacrifice. As long as we have a sin nature that will continue – and our sin natures are still very much alive and active!
I encourage you to forgive quicker, initiate sooner, sacrifice more and be willing to pay the price to become closer to your mate or whomever God has put in your life to fill up your empty spaces. It’s not easy – nothing worthwhile is. But growing in my relationship with Nancy has done more than anything else in life to help me mature and grow to become more like Jesus. As you grow closer to another human being your ability to grow closer to God with greatly increase.
It’s not good for a man (or woman) to be alone. It’s not good for me to be alone. I thank God I don’t have to be. It means more than words can express to have Nancy with me in India! (January 22, 2016 )
Genesis 2:18-25 The Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him. … So the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping He took one of the man’s ribs and closed up the place with flesh. Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib He had taken out of the man, and He brought her to the man. The man said, “This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called ‘woman,’ for she was taken out of man.” For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.
Is there anything between you and your mate that you need to forgive, or ask forgiveness for? In what ways can you initiate a closer relationship? What are your greatest fears in totally opening yourself up to God or allowing another to open themselves to you? Pray about this. Write down specific things you can do to draw closer to your mate.